5 Songs That Remind Me of High School

Sk8er Boi by Avril Lavigne

In my freshman year of high school, Sk8er Boi made sense.  Of course, five years from now the sk8er boi is gonna be rockin up MTV and the slutty ballet girl will be at home alone with her baby!  I’d bet my Zumiez hoodie on it!  What do you mean that in a few years she’ll be the one on MTV and he won’t, because MTV won’t even play music anymore?  What do you mean Avril doesn’t even skateboard?  You’re destroying my world!

Get Low by Lil Jon & the East Side Boyz feat.Ying Yang Twins 

From the fogged up cafetorium window to that dirty, dirty wall, Get Low had the sweat droppin’ down Batavia High Schoolers balls at every homecoming dance.   While I never enjoyed the song, that didn’t stop every other 15-year-old boy from whipping off his dress shirt and helicoptering it above his head while an insecure freshman ground against his dress pants.  If nothing else, Get Low taught a whole generation of Batavia girls how to drop dat ass to the floor with tears in their eyes. 

Milkshake by Kelis

We had a very progressive art department in my high school, which meant that we had long discussions about what, exactly, Kelis meant by “her milkshake.”  Eventually deciding that Kelis was referring to her vagina juice, my art teacher banned the song from our classroom, but not before buying the whole class McDonald’s milkshakes.  What the hell did it all mean?

Yeah by Usher feat. Lil Jon and Ludacris

Yeah spent 12 weeks at the top of the charts. 

Twelve motherfucking weeks.

In its own way, it was the Rolling in the Deep of its time, except, you know, it was complete and utter shit.  It was inescapable, even during the school day.  I remember when it came on the car radio during Drivers Ed, and, not wanting to take her hands off of the wheel, Suzanne Lang nearly crashed the car into a Denny’s in an attempt to get the song to stop playing.  I would have gladly died if it meant never hearing Yeah again.

Lose Control by Missy Elliot feat. Ciara and Fatman Scoop

Oh my God, how lucky was the class of 2006 to have one of the best songs of our lives come out in time for the greatest night of our lives: Prom! There’s no better way to celebrate the end of high school than by writhing to Missy and coming to the slow realization that in college you’ll never get away with wearing a tiara. So go ahead and lose control!  What happens in high school stays in high school…or in the dumpster of that nearby Plato’s Closet.


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